October 5, 2022

James took his coat off and hung it on the peg,, where it always was, waiting for him to take it wherever he went. He walked into the kitchen, melancholy, and full of wonder as his mind thought back to the days of his youth. Working on Yachts and falling in love at every port until the list of loves became like a list of books you’ve read. It no longer was a simple question to answer about how many women he’d slept with or how many times he’d been in love. He had to second guess himself. In recent years he’d answered with “ Ou don’t really want to know that” and if pressed he would say “4”. Bizarre world in which you were expected to keep your own score as you went and nearly every other person was keeping their own “score”. It turned it into a giant competition. Life was probably confusing enough without developing this incredibly complex game called Love. It was a constant battle to remain afloat in the overcrowded sea of humanity.
He set his briefcase down and walked into the living room, grabbing a banana as he passed through the kitchen. He sat in his lazy boy recliner and reached for the remote control after rocking the lever back as far as it would recline. Kicking off his shoes he wondered to himself: “ Why are my socks so nice. Why do they have designs woven into them. Not so much.because I like them, but as a part of the game. At some point I determined that Nice socks would make it simpler to seduce women.”
He kicked off his shoes one at a time. Right foot first, then left foot. They dropped to the floor just beneath the footrest of the recliner. He knew they would get in the way when he went to un-recline, but at this point he didn’t care. Later he would be annoyed with himself for creating more work for his later self. Life is like that. The now you is usually making decisions for the later you, invariably they are lousy decisions. Maybe you get it right more often as you get older, but you still screw up in a big way. Hindsight is 20/20, Foresight is often blind. If we knew the future would we let it happen, or would we change the future, making it unknowable. Knowing too much is worse than knowing nothing sometimes.
What if you knew you’re destiny and hated it? Would you create it by trying to evade it? In which case would you have created it without the knowledge. Does the universe have clockwork motion which gives us 70 or 80 years before we have to return to our places? What do we want? Now is the time to communicate with our future selves so that we don’t regret any decisions later, make the best decisions possible. What should I do? Do what your think is right. Don’t hold back n your beliefs, explore them, trust them, make the most of your hunches and talents. It isn’t really what you think that counts, do you get what I’m saying? It makes sense to live your life as if every decision is your last. When does it end? We don’t know. I t goes on as long as it goes on so make yourself at peace today. Find what it is you need to do. What you would regret in your last moments. So what if you thought it would go on, you’d have more time. You don’t that is the nature oft eternity. The world isn’t the friendliest place in the universe. It is made to solve problems. Think of the world as a laboratory.The picture you had as a child was not entirely wrong. The Universe, God is a consciousness, which works in a clockwork fashion to an ultimate goal. Humanity and life is actually a way to solve certain theoretical problems. Life is placed within the universe in various situations to which the best solution is found to adaptation. I is not the word of anything. Each planet not a laboratory, but a test tube contained within the vast laboratory that Is the universe. The giant technicians must extract samples to trace enhancement and evolution to environment…i/e ufos, abductions, disappearance, etc. if birds didn’t exist would flight be thought of.

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