One of the main reasons I can see for getting out of Iraq is the unpantied goat problem…we need to leave these people alone, give them some privacy, so no one dies due to a nekkid goat. Allah forbid! Goats are WMDs!
pick your reason for dying…
According to a recent poll conducted by Opinion Dynamicsâand reported by FOX Newsâ67% of Americans believe that the U.S. will be unable to stop a civil war from breaking out in Iraq. 3% think there is already a civil war going on. 31% say the U.S. should pull out troops gradually over the next year, while 27% vote for a complete pullout by the end of 2006.
Few Americans still believe that the U.S. occupation has improved the situation in Iraq. Constant news on Shiite/Sunni kidnappings and the increasing power of Islamist fanatics in the country have left us exasperated and confused. And the new âU.S.-friendlyâ? Iraqi government seems questionable, to say the least.
To assess how bad the situation really is, real-life examples usually tell a better story than numbers.
On August 7, NPR journalist John Hendren reported that âShepherds in the rural western Baghdad neighborhood of Gazalia have recently been murdered. . . for failing to diaper their goats. Apparently, the sexual tension is so high in regions where sheiks take a draconian view of Sharia law that they feel the sight of naked goats poses an unacceptable temptation.â?
But itâs not only goats moving their uncovered behinds in a sensual way that irks fervent believers. Produce, too, has gotten a bad reputation.
In East Baghdad, said Hendren, â[a] grocer and three others were shot to death and the store was firebombed, because he suggestively arranged his vegetables. I couldnât believe it at first. . . But an Iraqi colleague explained matter-of-factly that Shiite clerics have recently distributed a flyer directing grocers how to display their food. Standing up a celery stock near a couple of tomatoes in a way that mightâto the profoundly repressedâsuggest an aroused male is now a capital offense.â?
Even though Hendren has seen a lot, the latest developments have left him speechless. âIâve learned a new oxymoron: religious assassins. Iâve watched friends move repeatedly to stay ahead of attacks by insurgents. And now Iraqis are dying over goat panties and naughty veggies.â?
My books don’t fit in any neat box — because they’re about people who feel something huge is missing… and actually go look for it. Some even find it.
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CD Damitio writes at indignified.substack.com — essays on utopias, dystopias, and the spaces between. Free to read. No algorithm, no sponsored content. His books can be found on Amazon at https://www.amazon.com/stores/CD-Damitio/author/B001JP7NWA
CD Damitio writes INDIGNIFIED — utopias and dystopias explored. Free to read.
