I had an email from a 16-year old vagabond back in 2010 asking me for advice about how to live his life and ‘escape from the cave’. This is what I told him. I stand by this advice today. I wonder what happened to him?
This is my advice. It’s hard to say for sure, because I don’t know you, but this is the advice I wish someone had given me.
1) Understand that it’s all a rip off. It’s all a rip off that is trying to take your time. You and everyone else has a limited amount of time. We will die, for sure. The biggest traps for me were booze and drugs. Fun, but oh, I wish I had that time back. I could have been camping, hitching, or writing! I could have been fucking! Instead I was wasting my time and my money.
2) College is great. I waited until I was in my 30s, but it would have been cool to do it before. Just get someone else to pay for it. The ideas, the experiences…and the girls. Go to college but do yourself a favor and get scholarships, it’s worth it to put some extra hours in studying to get the grades in high school, since they allow you to get a free ride. If not, focus on any scholarship you can.
3) Take short trips whenever you can. Weekend trips fill the gap between summer months on the road. Go everywhere even if it is only ten miles away.Don’t miss the Grand Canyon because you live in Arizona, know what I mean? The close things are often as cool or cooler than the far ones.
4) Take time to write. Start a blog. Learn to do basic coding.
5) Don’t undervalue your time. Ask for more money and then work harder. Make it clear to employers that you are not ordinary. Do a kick ass job every time.
6) Don’t waste your money. Booze and drugs are expensive. Cars are expensive. Fancy clothes are expensive. Worthless women are expensive. Spend your money on the things that matter and save the rest for your adventures.
7) Women. Write down exactly what you want. It’s only then you will find her. I mean exactly. Height, hair, hobbies, qualities. She is there. Don’t settle.
8) Know when someone will refuse to lose an argument and don’t waste your time. Just say, I see what you are saying and move on.
9) A good friend has these five qualities. 1) You can trust them with money 2) They won’t judge you 3) You can trust them with your woman 4) You can trust them with a secret 5) They are there when you need them. Don’t waste your time on anyone who doesn’t have these qualities. When you find a good friend, be all of the above.
10) Write your own ten commandments. Know your morals and refuse to budge.
I hope this helps. Being in the cave sucks, but it’s got no door on it. Just walk out.
All the best,
~Vago
Awesome advice V – same here – they should really have a class in high school teaching “Real Life Lessons 101” – my additions to your list:
1. Never say anything bad about anyone to others – if need be – let the person know themselves how you fell or simply keep it quiet. Spouting disdain about anyone never helps. Although, if you feel this person or entity is about to harm another – let the world know –
2. If a person is not worthy of your time – don’t waste it on them just to be nice – time isn’t nice and you never get back that wasted time on someone undeserving.
3. Help when you can – it feeds the soul and opens doors you never knew existed.
4. Read or listen to the lyrics of “Que Será Será” – yeah – I know … corny – but true:
‘Que sera, sera,
‘Whatever will be, will be;
‘The future’s not ours to see.
‘Que sera, sera,
‘What will be, will be.
5. My personal philosophy on those people worthy of your time: “Enter into someones life whole – have no beginning or end – you’ll never be remembered in fragments”